** I could open a wig shop with all the hair in the drain.

** The cooler weather's giving me that "Holy-Crap-My-Twins-Have-No-Pants-That-Fit-Them" feeling.

** Every now and again, you've gotta call the Grammar Police on YOURSELF.

** I am without a doubt more excited than my kids on no homework nights.

** When both football AND soccer practice get cancelled, you realize that maybe Mama Nature's not such a bitch after all.

** Miley's tongue and that damn foam finger are apparently NEVER going away.

** Not only am I not smarter than a 5th grader, but turns out that I'm also not stronger than a 5th grader.

** Boys sure do love to be naked.

** It's totally acceptable to be watching "Magic Mike" while your daughter's upstairs watching a Disney movie with her friend.  (Am I right or am I right?!)

** I fully expect our whole house to be enclosed in a giant spider web one of these days.

** Hoda Kotb continues to make me love her more and more.

** If you can't kill them with kindness, confuse the hell out of 'em instead.

** A day without laughing is like a meal without wine.  (Oh, wait...is that just me?)

** Despite what I might think, God does not give me more than I can handle.

SO WHAT DID YOU LEARN THIS WEEK???? >>

 

 

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Tags: 5th, Cyrus, Disney, Hoda, Kotb, Magic, Mike, Miley, VMA's, comedy, More…fall, family, football, graders, grammar, homework, kids, laughing, moms, motherhood, parenting, soccer, treadmill, twins, wigs, wine, workout

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